Okay I have to admit that I just love looking at all the beautiful blogs out there. There are some amazing women out there who seem to have beautiful homes, beautiful children and beautiful marriages. They also seem to have lots of spare time to put together beautiful blogs that document these beautiful lives all with beautiful music playing in the background. Now this is not sour grapes by any means. I love my life. My husband and I have a great marriage and we are coming up on our sweet 16th wedding anniversary in September. We have 5 children and are able to spend a lot of time with them and enjoy raising them. I am a stay at home mom and I watch my 2 nieces. I love being an aunt and that the cousins are really getting to know each other. Life truly is good. So where am I going with this. There is a part of me that would love a beautiful place to blog, something a little shabby and very chic. Better still I have plenty of space for it. Our bedroom is big enough to have a sitting area that would be perfect. Our dining room and formal living room area would be a great place for blogging too. Actually these rooms would be even better because I could still be near my family while blogging. So why don't I have a beautiful blogging spot? I could say it is because I'm so busy being with my family that I don't have time or that I have been a clutter collector for so long that I can't seem to get through it but really they would only be partly the truth. The real truth is that I am finallly breaking through the clutter. Lots of it has been donated, trashed or sold. I'm not sure what my hang up is.... I'm not sure I want that for myself.... or is it that I don't feel deserving? I hear my daughter say that she wants a better life but then she self sabotages herself left and right. She has an attachment disorder. She doesn't truly feel worthy of good things and good relationships. Maybe there is a small part of me that shares that with her. It's something to think about and then move on to just do it. It might be good. I'll let you know. I might even post some photos.
clean slate in the garden
2 days ago